drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I have post one night stand depression
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
