So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
