You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Need sex. Gaining weight.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
