i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
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