So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
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