Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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