69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I'm really busy with my period
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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