Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize