i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Randomize
