Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
