True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
