My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize
