Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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