you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
