how can u be prego again
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
