what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
