Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Randomize
