I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize