i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
