Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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