just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
