I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Randomize
