Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
