Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
