it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
