have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
