I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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