Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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