I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
