i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize