yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Randomize
