Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
