hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Randomize
