Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
they're like a gay fantastic four
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
