How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize