I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize
