I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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