dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
