cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
