TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
