If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
