You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Randomize
