I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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