We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Randomize
