just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Randomize
