If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
