yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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