I am in a vortex of obligation.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
