wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
