What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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