I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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