You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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